Monday, September 17, 2012

15 Years

It's been so long since the last parting with a close relative, my grandfather. Then and now, somewhat similar, somewhat different.

Remember when grandpa's time come, I was looking at daddy on the phone, a long-distance call. A similar look during the day in hospital last week.

15 years back. In the mid of examination period, I was numb. Was only able to catch a flight back home 2 days after.
Glad I did see granny this time, before she took her last breathe. But how did I cry seeing her, and did she see me.

The family is different. With more young ones, without some cousins, without an aunt. With more further-related relatives around. With more people coming from around the peninsula from hours of driving journey. You are just amazing.

Numbed by the rituals, only did I really feel the lost once I get to think out of it. Pictures of her in the past, and recently. Stories and incidents. Life and death, how close or far is it?

Wonder if it is a relief for her, due to the suffering she goes through the past 3 years. Definitely a huge pity, for plans that were being carried out, no chance to be fulfilled.

For all the kindness when grandma was down until her final journey, from the related and less-related ones, So deeply appreciate. You will be remembered always by us, and by grandma.

Thank you.
Sadhu, sadhu, sadhu.

Saturday, September 08, 2012

Parting

Mixed feelings. Half predicted that she will leave us soon. Just did not expect the process would be that rush, that fast.

Sometimes I thought I could feel her breathing. My illusion. Hoping for a miracle. Did not happen.

Love you, grandma.
Rest in peace.